bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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