He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
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i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
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Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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