i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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