Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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