You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
