I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
