I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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