google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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