So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize