I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
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I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
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Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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