he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
