i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize
