I think im going to throw up on grandma
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Randomize