This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize