Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
