I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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