if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize