this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
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