i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I'm at about main and main street
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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