im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
