Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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