I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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