Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
