Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
