we have officially lost it.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Randomize
