I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I'm jealous of your bromance
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize