He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
Randomize
