i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
