I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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