So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Randomize
