it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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