the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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