...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
COCAINE IS GR8
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize