that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
