What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
