As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
