i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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