walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
