Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
