Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
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