When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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