I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize