She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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