I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
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