Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
