omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize