I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
