I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
