why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
