It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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